The long night

All through the long night

I have battled fear 

And his laughing face

In every mirror

Over and over I vanquished

And destroyed him

Till at the end I asked myself

Why did I spend my whole life

Battling fear?

Restless in the furnace of your heart

Restless is a stirring and a rumbling

Deep within the furnace of your heart

Where you struggle to remember

The promise that you made in the dream

Long before you landed in these dark shapes

Where you know you must.take the next step

In the long journey to who you are

Surrender

When I open the door

To the green and blue world

I surrender to the sky

When I close the door

Behind me where I live

I surrender to my walls

Here’s another one

No words were spoken

When the gush of who I am

Sparkled in handfuls of comfort

And release in the signals

Of the silent darkness

You can continue now they said

Gather up yourself and carry on

The silver clouds of daylight are waiting

Start and stop start and stop

I didn’t mind the thin shine

On the words of pain

Flowing over the rock of calm

Below my eyes

The rock is a bump of being

On the giant earth we stand on

Hurtling through a universe of light

Some of you out in “Blog world” may have noticed that I have dropped out, stopped posting, stopped reading, stopped writing? Not all true. I stopped posting and participating / reading here. I haven’t stopped writing. I don’t know if I ever do, not completely. Lately I write something, almost always in night or early morning. I’m glad I wrote it though I don’t think it’s any good. Later I look at it and say to myself- what crap or needs work and never look at it again. Sometimes I think being depressed isn’t a problem that needs “fixing”, it’s a logical response to this world we live in. So I’m thinking of trying a different approach – posting the junk that needs work and see what comes of doing that…..